"How To Talk To Girls"

I wasn't ballin' like this kid back in the 4th grade.
Alex Greven, a 9-year-old in Colorado wrote a self-help book called "How To Talk to Girls" and now Fox has bought its movie rights! He's getting low to mid six figures.

From Reuters:

Greven wrote "Girls" as a handwritten, $3 pamphlet sold at his school book fair; he wrote it after he noticed his peers were having some trouble talking to the ladies, though the book is geared for all ages. Among this advice: Comb your hair and don't wear sweats; control your hyperness and cut down on sugar if necessary; a crush is like a love disease that can drive you mad; it is easy to spot pretty girls because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry but are like cars that need a lot of oil.

I obviously need a mulligan on my childhood.